Days of Deception - Truth is Your Sword!

This is a powerful message! (Matthew 7:21-23) Proof in the word of God that our works are just that...."works" and no reflection of our true relationship with Christ. We may prophesy, we may drive out evil, we may perform miracles....but as it says in verse 21 "only the one who DOES THE WILL OF THE FATHER" will enter. Hence, just because we perform works (which don't get me wrong, are valuable to build up others and build the church) doesn't mean we are doing the will of the father (His entire will). The only way to know what the will of the Father is, is through knowing His word. You'll never truly have a relationship with Him or KNOW him if you don't know His word. We should also be careful and mindful of those who pick and choose "portions" of His will from the Bible and claim to be a teacher, preacher or prophet. Yet totally negate other principles of the word and truths of God's will that are written. This is how we get misled, become blinded and end up with a distorted truth ourselves. Revelation 22:18-19 is very clear!

We need all remember that there are many great teachers, preachers, leaders; and there will also be many sheeps in wolves clothing who aren't doing the will of God at all; but rather deceiving many with their mighty "works" while compromising the truth and leading people to praise them instead of Jesus. At the end of the day HIS WORD is your truth and HIS SPIRIT your compass! Keep your spiritual senses always alert as God warned us that in the last days false influences would come. My advice....separate the sheep from the wolves WITH the sword of God's word. And when you are blessed to find teachers, preachers and leaders who you can truly see are doing, living and breathing the will of God, pray for them and support them. Their callings will NOT get any easier in the days to come. God bless all the sheep doing the will of God with pure hearts, right motives, aligned with God's word. And always remember we too have to regularly check ourselves in the mirror of God's word. Even sheep can sometimes get confused and wander off course and out of His will. Love you my friends ❤️ #weareinthedaysofdeception

MINDFUL not MINDLESS

Love not hate, nurturing speech not gossip, truth not fluff, commune not competition, edify not degrade, compliment not compare, fully embracing not being selective.......so many other important basic principles I could list that helps us build and encourage each other, but marinate on this. Who, what or where can we all make a shift to be more of a builder than a breaker? We ALL fall short in this area somewhere and can do better. 

The breaking of someone's spirit can happen in the loudest of ways or very quietly. It can happen in the obvious or subtle. Many times we may even be unaware that we've played a part in putting a crack in someone's spirit; be it by a word, conversation, action, or neglect. 

Even those moments when the Holy Spirit prompts us to move by showing an act of kindness or love yet we dismiss it....that plays a part in the breaking down of one's spirit. Because in that moment, God wanted to MOVE in that person's brokenness to build them up and show them love and He chose us as the vessel; so if we miss it....then what's truly lost in that moment?? Could be that persons healing, breakthrough or moment of joy an encouragement for the day. 

We can all love better, care deeper and build others by simply being MINDFUL not MINDLESS when it comes to those around us. Whether it's your immediate circle or a stranger....be mindful. ALL that we do (and ALL that we DON'T do) has an impact! 

I ask God and anyone I've been mindless to, to forgive me. God helps us to grow and love more like you with every passing day! Amen! ❤️

Who's Leading Anyway???

"We Dance"

His Lead - I Follow

I have a passion for music and dance. I think they are two of the most beautiful gifts ever given to mankind. I've experienced a LOT of dancing in my life. Most of it was not exactly glorifying to God. Perhaps to the men in the clubs or the empty drink left on the bar. But certainly not to God. 

Thanks to many turns of events in my life, I now find myself, my spirit, dancing for ONE. It's the most beautiful, intimate, freeing, life-breathing dancing I've ever experienced. My spirit is never still and HIS dance floor is the only one for me. My spirit is always moving with His rhythm, with His heartbeat. To me, my walk with God has been very much like dancing. Sometimes a beautiful Ballet, other times a fun Salsa, even a Tango from time to time. As with any dance, one leads, one follows. I can't lie, I've not always been the best follower to my partner. I've often stepped on His toes or just fumbled the dance all together. But He always takes me by the hand, lifts my chin, and starts to sway with me again. Fortunately after some rough tumbles and trips, I've learned to allow HIM to lead and have become a much better follower. The thing about dancing with God is, no matter how many times you have to repeat the steps, start over, practice or rest....He never stops taking you by the hand ready and willing to continue His role as lead. 

The most beautiful dance and incredible experience thus far for me, above all else, has been watching promises from God come to pass in my life. I'm not speaking of specific scriptures or promises in the Bible, as incredible and life giving as they are! No, the promises I'm specifically speaking of right now are those most intimate, directly spoken promises made to my spirit from my Father in heaven; those breathed directly into my heart in a such a way there is NO denying who it came from OR that He will bring it to fruition. 

After a conversation today that will set the next leg of my journey in motion, I find myself sitting back and reflecting over the last 10 years and I can see so clearly how everything that has happened in my life, has been to lead me EXACTLY where I stand today on this great dance floor of His. God has spoken to me many times in my life. Caught me during many falls. Encouraged me in many times of fear. Built me up in seasons of growth and taught me priceless lessons of what this journey is truly all about. There have been good times, fruitful times, celebratory times. But there have also been bad times, trying times, stretching times, confusing times, cold times, quiet times......but in EVERY season HE was constant. He gave me His JOY to remind me WHY I'm on this journey to begin with and He gave me HIS strength to carry me through it all. He's given me His supernatural wisdom and discernment to be able  to understand and have peace that it's all strategic, all planned, so that I'd never lose heart in what He was doing in and through me. Have I gotten it all right along the way? Goodness no! But does He turn even my blunders for good? Thank goodness YES! 

Yes, He speaks to me quite often. He'll speak to all of us if we take time to listen. But today, I spent a lot of time in thanksgiving for two very specific and CLEAR times in my life where God TOLD me what He was going to do, in my life and through my life. All I had to do was be a willing servant to the ONE who loves me more than anyone ever will and say "yes" to the ONE who will always have my best interest at heart. 

The first time was about 6 years ago. God was preparing me for one of the most significant and precious things I would ever do on this earth for Him. God spoke through a woman who obviously had the gift of prophecy. He spoke this verse through her: Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." I was overcome in the spirit at the same time and while lost in this spiritual realm, I saw a vision. A vision that God wanted me to carry out. TALK ABOUT SCARY! So scary it would be nearly a year before it happened! This vision involved His precious daughters. Loving them, serving them, leading them......what???? Who am "I" oh God??? I'm no one, I'm not able, I'm messed up! But the ONE thing He knew I could do, was love. Love with a relentless, authentic, unconditional deep love. ONLY because of ALL He'd already done in my own life and the love He'd shown me. If I didn't get ANYTHING else, I got the "love" part down. And I fully understood the innermost struggles of a woman. That day began a path that derailed my life from how it previously existed, forever. I began fulfilling this God-breathed vision through the means of a Holy Spirit led group that still exist today for the purpose of loving women to life. Watching His vision unfold and still unfold today in the lives of countless women has been and still is the greatest joy of my spiritual journey thus far. These women have laid hold of His vision and carried it forth in their own arena's of influence. It's moved me, touched me and changed me more than I ever could have imagined. But that's our God, always thinking bigger than we could ever dream. 

Which leads me to the current "song & dance" in my life. 

The second time God spoke to me EVER so clearly happened June of 2014, standing on a cliff in the beautiful country of Northern Ireland, over looking the most majestic scenery I have ever seen. Many of you may have read my blog about it, yep, that same cliff. That experience with my Father will never leave me. 

While I have had the "itching" to go back to school for years in hopes of equipping myself to move on to something I really love to do as opposed to dying in corporate America, I've never stepped out to do it. For many years it was just LIFE in the way. Okay, and I won't lie, some of it was that good ol' fear that I used to love to wrestle with. Still do at times. However, God took me to Ireland to make some things VERY clear to me that I'd been wrestling with. Many full revelations wouldn't come  until months after being home. But ONE was spoken with MOST certainty! God told me I would go back to school; that I would get the education I needed to do ALL He's called me to do. You see, for years, I believed loving on a group of women and watching them go out to spread that love was it! (If you haven't read my blog on "capping" God....it'll explain that a little more). But on this cliff, it was made crystal clear to me that God was not done changing my own personal world, nor was He done using this messed up chic to change the world around her. 

I won't lie, I'm 42. I work full time. I struggle financially. I have little to no free time. Had God told me this  six to 7 years ago, the fear at even the thought of "school" would have crippled me.  But now, after watching Him GIVE vision and FULFILL vision and finally being at a place in my journey where I can SEE the fullness of it ALL, I'm trusting HIM that HE will bring what He says to pass. The past eight months, as I've continued to say "yes" to God, even when I didn't fully understand what He was doing or why, He has removed EVERY obstacle and set me on a straight path that's led me to an education opportunity I would have never found had I been disobedient, doubtful, or fearful; had I said "no". Does it mean I've not felt afraid? No! But I know He is WAY BIGGER than my fear and with Him I can do it anyway! (Philippians 4:13) I can do it afraid! Because His promises, especially the intimate, personal promises given to just us as individuals, HE WILL KEEP and HE WILL MAKE A WAY! Faith is all about BELIEVING GOD will do what He says and doing what HE says you need to do to get there; even IF afraid. 

I am only a couple weeks away from embarking on the next season of my spiritual journey. My peace, joy, and inner strength WILL carry me again. Fear is NO comparison for what God breathes into our spirits! 

In the time following my cliff experience in Ireland and that beautiful revelation I could never adequately describe, a dear friend who was on the mission trip as well approached me. She said God gave her a word for me. My ears perked up and my mind traveled back to all those years ago when the last time someone said this to me, my life changed forever. (Remember, Jeremiah 29:11) As I listened with GREAT anticipation, she said to me: "The Lords says to you, "Remember from whence you came, and fear not where you are to go."

I don't think to this day she even realizes the significance those words would have in my life. Within months, I was left CLINGING to the memories of where I'd come from and all that God had done. It carried me through some very difficult and confusing changes in my life. "Remember from whence you came"....I clung tightly to just that, because had I not, I could have questioned EVERYTHING that was happening, even God, in a way that would not have been healthy. I had to keep my heart focused on ALL He had already done. 

Little did I know the latter part of her words, "and fear not where you are to GO", would be exactly what God was instructing me to do. GO applied in many areas, in many ways to the season I was walking through. He was asking me to GO away from all I've known and  GO into the unknown. The unknown did strike fear, but I have held on to those words, "fear NOT where you are to go". Clinging on to those words, I kept GOing, where ever He said, whenever He said. Not always smiling about it, sometimes feeling lonely about it, confused about it, but GOing anyway. Because His ways are not our ways, but His ways are always better than our own. 

But today, I sit here with a heart so full of gratitude and thanksgiving and love. HE KNOWS far better than I do what I need to do, where I need to be, who I need to glean from, what I need to focus on, areas I need to work on and all that is needed to accomplish me staying on the path that will fulfill the purposes HE has called me to. 

He KNOWS, HE sees, He planned and so He guides. It’s so invigorating and deeply moving that it’s a struggle to maintain my composure at times! I’m literally having a party in my spirit with God every moment of the day anymore! And today, right now, I am moved to my knees as I watch His miraculous ways unfold in my life yet again! I can’t describe it, I can’t convey it, there is just no way to know what I’m saying without experiencing it for yourself. And I hope if you haven’t, that one day you do. NO HIGH has ever been better than the constant high I live on today! I’m so thankful, I’m so humbled. 

In just a couple weeks, I will be going to college to pursue my AA in Ministry then moving on to my BA in Christian Counseling. He said it, I believe it, because I believe HIM. 42, working, struggling, blah blah blah....so what! Those things are NOTHING next to my God! So I keep moving with His rhythm, swaying to the music He whispers in my ear and trusting Him every step of the way.  

Our journeys are NEVER done. Do NOT cap our great God. As long as His spirit is alive within you, the possibilities are endless because HE can do ANYTHING and HE lives in YOU! 

GLORY GLORY GLORY TO MY ALMIGHTY GOD! NONE of this would be possible without HIM! He has moved mountains, opened doors and walked me over EVERY stepping stone I needed to take and moved me through every life transition necessary to bring me where I stand now. He will continue to guide me where I’m headed because the direction is HIS. I don't want to drive my own car...ever, ever again. 

Are you dancing with fear, doubt, lack of courage? Think He can't use you? Think He can't use you? Think there's no purpose or plan for YOUR life? Ohhhhh, my sweet friends, it's just not true. There IS a plan and purpose for you. Read my life verse, but take it a little further: Jeremiah 29:11-13 "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.  Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.  You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." 

He hears you when you pray, and if you seek Him with ALL your heart, you will find Him AND your purpose!

One of my favorite songs is "We Dance" by Bethel Music 

It's the perfect song to describe my love story with my God! If you'd like to hear it, here is a link. 

https://youtu.be/fFfw6OSbUwE

The only thing in this life I would want more than all I've already received is for others to also experience God in the beautiful ways I have. I lift everyone who may ever read this, that they might take a chance and truly LIVE in all God has for them. There is a plan for us ALL, it's our choice whether or not to surrender to it. Truth is, we ALL surrender to "something". Be it the world or God. I can promise you, that surrender to GOD will NEVER return void. I pray you too learn to "dance with Him". 

I love you Lord, my forever dance partner.....

Dena xoxo

Trusting God - Even In The Shadows

Every revelation from God won't light, fluffy, beautiful or easy to swallow. In fact, some can be quite painful. But when revealed, the one detrimental thing we can do is reject what He's shown us. We need to "trust the engineer" and walk through ALL He's called us to; whether easy or challenging. Because no matter how painful, life altering or difficult a revelation or truth may be....God ALWAYS reveals it for your best interest and for the best interest of the purposes He's placed on your life. So STAY the course, STAY in alignment, even when it's HARD!  Don't reject His direction, carry on boldly the track down the track He's given you, trust Him and use every bit of it to grow your testimony and pour the lessons and wisdom He shows you into the world around you as you go❤ He ask you to do your part, what He's asked of you. All other details....He takes care of. Christ didn't have an easy, breezy journey....He had enemies, trials, pains, stumbling blocks, betrayers, gossipers, naysayers, doubters....but He never turned in His ticket and got off the train. He completed the call and purpose His Father placed on His life, HE trusted the engineer. He will direct every step, clear every path, remove every obstacle and open every door. TRUST HIM in ALL things, at ALL times. Be blessed this Sunday my friends❤

"Keep It Real"....Are We Really?

People pride themselves on being someone who "keeps it real" with others. But I feel the greater achievemnnet is one's ability to "keep it real" with themselves. These are the folks I admire & respect so much. May we always do more SELF reflection, than inspections of others. The best way for us to keep CLEAR vision is to tend to our own logs that are blocking it. If we do that, if we "keep it real" with ourselves....then we remain humble; teachable; and have a greater ability to love others unconditionally & authentically! It all starts, continues and ends "WITHIN". Self reflection is not a one time task. It's a lifetime maintenance method to keep a pure heart, with pure motives. LOOK DEEPER, SEEK HARDER, LIVE WISER and LOVE PURE! Shalom my friends. Matthew 7:3
"Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?"

Counting the Cost - Dena's Daily Snip It

Counting the cost is not always easy. Picking up your cross to follow Him can mean many things throughout your journey. It can mean pain, loss, sacrifice, being an outcast, suffering, transition, replacing familiar with unfamiliar, it will require great trust and dependency on God. (Hmmm..seems someone has modeled this for us before huh?) It will require great wisdom, discernment and prayer to be sure you're walking in HIS will and not your own. It will take great courage to follow His will for your life despite what the world or popular opinion may be. But the rewards of obedience to God are truly PRICELESS. BUT BE CAUTIOUS: Don't dare ever move without Him! However, don't stay when He says "follow me". How do you know the difference?? Learning to KNOW His voice is the key. You can't follow instructions if you don't know the teacher, never go to class and don't open the book! Seek and you'll find (Jeremiah 29:13). His sheep know His voice (John 10:27) Get in a church with other believers, learn about and get to know the greatest teacher, open His manual for LIFE, your Bible! Then you'll learn and KNOW His voice. The journey is full of peace when the trip has the ultimate leader ❤ What's He calling YOU to? Are you ready? Willing? Thankfully He takes care of the "able" part  God speed my friends!

"DISCERNING TRUE PEACE & TAKING THE CAPS OFF!" - Northern Ireland 2014 - Sisterhood Trip / Forever changed!

We are all familiar with the universal "peace sign" that we so flippantly throw up in our photo's, farewells, or selfies of today. It's intention or meaning has varied over the last several decades.

At 41 years of age, I've come to understand TRUE peace, fully and completely, as I never have before. While I've had touches, glimpses, and full on depths of my soul moments with peace, NEVER in my life have I collided with it as I did just a little over a week ago on Friday June 20th, 2014. We'll get to that day in a moment, but let me first explain what led up to that life changing day.

In a quick flash, I'll attempt to give you a glimpse into what was, what is and what only God knows is to come for a girl who was hidden in the corners of her darkness to a girl redeemed. This is a journey through the beauty from ashes of my life.......will you travel with me? If so, I pray it blesses you out of your own ashes into all the beauty God has for you. (Isaiah 61:3)

Broken, dysfunctional family, (If you can't relate, know that you are SO blessed!), I think MOST of us have one in some way or another so no need in going into great detail there. Except to say, there was an absence of a LOT; love, identity, self worth, ambition, confidence, self esteem, value, and the list goes on. Empty, lonely, confused, full of FEAR, consumed with seeking identity and approval.....that was my early years.

This led me to some very self destructive years during my teens especially and into my twenties. Now ironically, I first found the Lord at the age of 13. Proving that "FINDING" Him and "LIVING" in Him are two totally different things. I found the Lord, became saved, but had no clue what to do with it afterwards OR how to apply it to my life. We must live IN Him in order to be shielded and armored from what life may throw at us.  A concept I had no clue about, so the self destruction inevitably came.

I lived many years seeking identity, value, worth and love through unhealthy relationships; physically abusive, emotionally abusive and mentally abusive relationships; all of which only did the OPPOSITE of what I was seeking. Stealing MORE of my value, worth, and taking me even further away from my true identity. This led me to dropping out of school, alcohol abuse, teen pregnancy, deeply rooted fear of never being good enough, lovable or worth anything. There are many horror stories within these years of shuffling, tripping and crawling through my ashes. But I'll spare you those details now, because more important is getting to the beauty and light that was DETERMINED to reach me through all the darkness.

Looking back, I see where God was ALWAYS protecting me from far worse that could have been. I see where there were His glimpses of light, where favor fell, protection came and love sheltered, even though at the time I had no clue what it was. I considered it "luck". I went on to give birth at 19 to my now 22 year old son whom I'll forever call my angel from God. While I still did not love myself or feel I was worthy of it AT ALL at this point, God gave me such indescribable love for this little human being! I knew that if not for myself, FOR HIM I had to get myself together. This precious child gave me the courage to flee from an abusive relationship, the drive to stop relying on drinking to ease pain or bring me joy and the discipline to go complete high school and take some vocational classes so I could provide some kind of life for us.

I recommitted my life to Christ when I was twenty-four and had the amazing joy of being baptized with my son who was five at the time. I won't even lie and say that I immediately began living a "God First" life from the jump start, but it certainly began my real, authentic journey with Jesus.

Fast forward a couple years, I was introduced to a church that would radically change my journey forever! I started attending Celebration Church, Jacksonville FL in 1998. I was a seat warmer for quite some time, QUITE some time. Being broken for so long can get too comfortable and the thought of repairing the fractures (even if it leads to joy and peace) can be more daunting sometimes than just settling for the residue of pain from years past. This was me. But I loved sitting there each Sunday hearing potential and love and grace spoken over me. It was new, refreshing and something I'd never experienced before. Little did I know it was God, once again, coming to my rescue......luck had NOTHING to do with it anymore. Even though I was quiet, not involved or active in the church itself, the transformation, fire storm that was brewing in my heart was NON stop!

I slowly and very gradually opened up to serving and doing small groups when I landed at the Orange Park campus of Celebration Church. Suddenly, it was like a whirlwind. God was placing people in my life that sowed value, worth and purpose into my future. People who showed me that my past choices, circumstances or mistakes do NOT negate my future! I was HEALING, my heart was being RESTORED, my soul gleamed with purpose and passion! It wasn't always easy. I had relationships to repair. I had doors to close. I had to find courage to walk through new ones. But it was all planned by God for me, so everything worked for the good! I'm so thankful today that I pressed through every fear, reservation and doubt into His will for my life. When we press into Him, we can do anything! (Philippians 4:13)

Eventually, after a couple years of stirring in my heart a love and passion for women, God gave me the incredible privilege of starting a small group for women called J.E.W.E.L.S. in a private home. I'd never had healthy relationships with women, didn't like women in years past, didn't trust them, didn't want the drama. But you see.....many times where our greatest struggle is will be where our calling is. It's ALL preparation for the journey that lies ahead of us. So in 2010, God did two major things in my life. One, He started this amazing women's group, entrusting "me" to show them how to love one another as we are called to by HIM, not the world. Two, He sent me on my first mission trip to Alajuelita, Costa Rica thanks to a wonderful friend gently pulling me out of my fear of going. (Yes, fear was still there! Just because we are walking a "God First" life, doesn't mean we will not struggle with our flesh or past strongholds. Our lives will always be a process of conquering those battles, one stepping stone at a time). We press into Him DAILY for renewing our spirits, to keep those things at the foot of the cross! (2 Corinthians 4:16)

For the following three years, I continued to hit the mission field to Costa Rica. Had the privilege to help lead the trip two of those four trips, as well as see both my sons go and my husband. This was an answered prayer of mine. God is SO very good! I also continued to lead my women's group as well. Watched the Lord bring COUNTLESS women to freedom and wholeness in Him. Watched it grow to an almost unmanageable size! But God always made a way. There are NO words to describe all that I've witnessed Him do! In that group, on the mission field, in my church and in my life! Just a mind blowing journey!!!!

In the title of this blog, I mention "taking the caps OFF". Caps meaning a top, or covering. God's will for our lives is not meant to be capped, concealed or contained. As you've read this story of mine, what you may not realize is that for every good step I took in Christ, or great achievement, I would "cap" myself there. Not believing that anything greater could ever happen. Getting my high school completion was the mountain top for me. Yep, can't do any more than that. Holding a job. Yep, that's it! I've reached the peak of my potential! Raising a son as a single mom. Oh yeah, this is the limit...I'm not capable of more, but thank you God for bringing me this far. Recommitting my life and making it to church every Sunday. Man, NO way I can ever do greater than that! Getting involved, walking out my painful past to healing, restoration, attending groups, serving, leading a group and the mission field.....WOW!!!! Now you're just showing off God. Surely that's IT for me now. Yep, no way little ol' me can do more or be more than what I am right now! (See what I mean about the strongholds breaking off in a process?? At times I would still walk in lack of confidence, self doubt and fear. EVEN after seeing the greatness of God in my life). What I didn't understand at the time was that I wasn't capping MYSELF, I was capping GOD! But hold on tight, because He was about to make SURE I got a full revelation and understanding of that! Whew.....was I not prepared for what was next!

Present day:

MAJOR changes are happening at once. One of them, being called away from Costa Rica this year to a completely different place on the mission field, Northern Ireland. It's a women's trip which thrills me as this is my hearts passion, but my heart broke at the thought of not going to Costa this year. In the months leading up to this trip, I continually asked God, "why am I going Lord?". I knew there must be SOMETHING He wants to reveal to me, to us all. This trip felt like a total REVELATION trip to me. Yet, at the time I didn't know why. The other major change was that the woman's group I led, that has been such a huge part of my life, has now been transitioned into the group life of our church's Sisterhood groups. It's grown and evolved into something bigger and I can see God's hand in all this. It was meant to lead to this growth. However, this transition was a bigger challenge than I ever imagined it would be for this "CAP CONNOISSEUR"! No matter how challenging or life changing these two shifts were proving to be, I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that this is what God wanted me to walk through, it's His will for both the group, the mission field experience and for me. So regardless of my flesh, my spirit must follow Him. Easy, nope. Irrefutable truth, yep! Do I understand it all "right now"? NO! Obedience isn't always easy, but in the end it will bring the most fruit not only to your life, but the Kingdom of God, which is all that matters! (Isaiah 1:19)

I'd gotten pretty comfortable over the last few years. All was going good. Great things were happening. "Why does it have to change?", my flesh often wondered. While I had no intention of trying to get in the way of what God was doing and only want to walk in His will, I was missing something. Something wasn't sitting right. Many nights of prayer, soul searching, reading His word, reading an incredible book called Anonymous, spending time meditating, praying, worshiping......SOMETHING still didn't sit quite right. At times I felt He was taking everything I loved from me. The mission field I'd walked for four years, the group of ladies I'd led for over three years...why God? But I would later realize, He wasn't taking anything "from" me, He was just changing the circumstances around how He fulfilled those God given passions. Amazing how perception changes everything. God is always doing a NEW thing, never to harm us, but to grow us, stretch us and work out His good and perfect will for our lives and the lives of others. (Isaiah 43:19)

But as I said, knowing all this and it being deep in your spirit are two different things. SOMETHING was still missing. I just couldn't figure it out. I received my first clue as to what it was at our send off dinner the weekend before leaving for Northern Ireland. An amazing woman of God and our Sisterhood Pastor Linda Griddle so graciously and beautifully prayed over each and everyone of us that were going on this trip. As we stood there lined up, awaiting our turn to be anointed with oil and prayed for, I could hear some of the things she spoke over a few of the ladies. I was BLOWN away at how on point she was! Mind you....she doesn't know any of us deeply or the details of what we struggle with or are walking in. My mind raced! Thinking WOW, she doesn't even realize how ON POINT she is! The Holy Spirit MUST be here!! THEN......I thought, "Oh man, if it's really Him, what in the world is He going to say to me!" Being in such a torn state recently.....I became a little nervous quite honestly. I've asked for answers, was I really ready to get it?!? Sure hope so, because it was coming.

When she approached me, (not knowing my internal struggles), she prayed a beautiful prayer and what specifically stood out in my heart and mind was this: "You need to go and find PEACE, peace in your heart and mind that surpasses all understanding. You will find it! Because there is a NEW gift coming. And it's coming quickly. So go, find that peace and get ready". (Insert MIND BLOWN now....wow)

Ok.....after a few gallons of tears and snot, I pulled myself together and managed the rest of the dinner. But WOW, her words stuck with me! I just kept thinking about them and realized......is it peace??? It that what's been tormenting me, a lack of peace about all of the transitions? But I trust God, I know this is all His will! Isn't that peace??? Apparently not. KNOWING something is God's will and having peace with it are completely different things. THIS I now know.

So now, we're off to Northern Ireland! I was blessed to be alongside 11 beautiful, funny, warm-hearted, courageous women. But I must admit, every day I kept wondering....peace Lord, that's why I'm here right? When will I feel it? Will I know it? What if I miss it? I want it and don't want to leave without it, please Lord. So I kept waiting......

First couple days we had awesome devo's, revelations were beginning, women on the trip stepping out and walking in boldness! Strongholds were beginning to fall to the wayside! It was only a glimpse of what was to come! It was beautiful and my heart was so full! But still........I waited. Have to admit, I even started to think; "well, maybe Pastor Linda was just a little off...maybe it won't happen until AFTER the trip or something". (Gotta love those doubts and caps! smh) Still.....I waited.

Friday, June 20th 2014.......I'll wait no more. We were taken to a place called Giant's Causeway. There was a rope bridge to cross, beautiful landscape, cliffs, mountains, flowers, ocean, birds,....it was BREATHTAKING! Little did I know what awaited me across that bridge......

After crossing the bridge, I made my way to the top of that mountain. The magnitude of it, the majestic beauty of it just simply can NOT be described. In 2010, the glorious mountains of Costa Rica WRECKED this girl who'd never seen a mountain in her life before then. God showed me in Costa a glimpse of how big He is. Now He was certainly showing me how even more GRAND He can be in my life if I take the caps OFF!

I stood there, in one spot, watching seagulls fly in the most beautiful, balletic dance around this high mountain top surrounded by this beautiful, massive ocean and I was overcome.

I started to just thank God for bringing me to a place of such beauty, such splendor, who am I to deserve this gift! In that moment, the wind blowing in my hair, caressing my face and hugging my neck became far more than just a breeze. It was the sweeping love of the Holy Spirit dancing His story of love and grace all around me. I couldn't take it! It was the most powerful feeling I have EVER experienced in my entire walk with Christ! I trembled, I cried, I smiled at the birds, at the sky, at the sea, at ALL His creation and wept at the power of His PRESENCE! He allowed me to stand there, basking in this moment, just soaking it in. But then, He had something to say. I began to see flashes of my life come before me. The broken girl, the dark girl, the hurting girl, the lost girl....all the vivid pictures of things that have happened, of where I came from! Then I began to see images of special moments in small groups, at church serving, faces of those who've poured into me. Then I began to see images of Costa Rica, reliving moments God gave me there. Then flashbacks of the women's group I led, the breakthroughs, the prayers, the worship nights, the tears, the hugs, the freedom. ALL of these visuals were real and tangible....as if they'd JUST happened! I was there.....again, feeling a flood of ALL those emotions past! Only walking through them as a fast track of my life up to the very moment where my feet NOW stood. All of a sudden, His voice was clear. Audible only to my spirit. God said to me: "Why my precious child do you continue to put a cap on me? Look and see where you've been, what I've brought you through and NOW where you stand, here, with Me. Is there ANYTHING impossible for me? Walk in my peace. Know that if I brought you from that broken little girl, to this mountain top in Ireland to just BE with me so that I could say this to you that I love you and I HAVE you, as well as every detail of your life. In every transition, in every change and in every where you will ever go, I have you!"

You know, God could have said this to me at home. He could have chosen to say this to me anywhere. But He chose to take me to a place where I could ONLY see and feel Him! Where I could not be distracted or swayed by my flesh, my past, or anything else. He is a purposeful GOD! There are no coincidences with Him! He knew when and where He needed me to be in order for me to hear from Him clearly and be able to receive what He wanted to say to me; not only geographically, but emotionally and spiritually! His timing is perfect....always.

To say I'm thankful for this experience is a gross understatement. I am forever changed. The peace that was spoken over me before even leaving US soil came to fruition. The many things spoken over this team prior to leaving came to fruition! So there is no doubt in my mind that this trip was ordained and set apart by the Holy Spirit for each one of us! He was there at every meeting, He was there at our send off meeting, He was there every moment of this trip and He is with us every moment now and......ALWAYS.

I'd love to tell you that the moment on the mountain was SO grand that I skipped joyfully on the hike that was required to go BACK the way we came. It was steep, it was hard, it was taxing on my asthma, joints and every other part of my body. But as I was making the tough hike back, alone, with God, I heard His voice say: "Hey....that was awesome up there wasn't it? But remember, your path getting to that moment wasn't easy, and I didn't promise you it would be easy going forward. But I did promise you that my will and my peace will be with you every step of the way. Press on, trust me, walk in peace." Wow.

Thank you God for the most incredible experience of my life. The "caps" are OFF! I will never cap your ability in my life again. Unlike my past, I KNOW that mountain top experience is not the best you have for me, but rather only the beginning. Trading in my caps for your peace, for the rest of my days.

God bless my team of 12 and all that lies ahead of each of us.

I pray for the readers of this blog. Lord I lift them to you now. May your peace find and keep them. May they come to fully understand that it's not THEIR ability, but YOURS. Their availability is all they need and to follow you, God first, always. May they come to truly believe that you have a will and purpose for each of their lives. Regardless of their past, strongholds, doubts and fears.....YOU have hope, love and purpose for their lives! (Jeremiah 29:11-12) In Jesus name, Amen!

We had a free day in Belfast on our trip to shop and what not. Many of us decided to spend our free day getting tattoos that would capture the cherished experience of this trip. Below is a picture of how I sealed my experienced permanently not only in my heart, but in a way that I will see a reminder of it daily! A dandelion blowing in that precious, Holy Spirit breeze I'll never forget, the parachute pieces blowing away & turning into 12 birds to represent the 12 of us on this team, flying away into the plans and purposes God has for each of us like the balletic dancing birds on that mountain top, my life verse and of course a little green shamrock to rep the country of Ireland where I danced with God on a mountain top.

I'm forever grateful to Pastor Linda for allowing the Holy Spirit to speak a word over me of peace and new gift over my life. Also forever grateful for my sister in the faith Lea Sims for being there through this transitional season in my life. You always speak life and potential into me. God brought you in my life at the perfect time, season & purpose. He always knows. To every sister on this trip, I love you  so very much and you all have played such a precious part in this journey. I pray you keep always keep your peace and never put a cap on God's plans for your life! Our God is an awesome God! His TRUE peace I now walk in, praise Jesus. The gift......remains to be seen. But one things for sure, there's no cap on it, I'm ready when He is xoxo

God Bless You,

Dena